• torrinnelson

Seasons

Seasons come and go, and some are always going to be more challenging than others. Summer and winter always feel longer than fall and spring, and that's because they kind of are? To me, summer is for sure the longest. When I was younger and the end of summer meant going back to school, I thought summer was always too short. I guess I wasn't old enough to enjoy the other seasons that I lived through. The only thing on my mind was fun and playing outside and enjoying the freedom from a schedule. I've grown up, and I don't think in that way anymore.


The first summer post-grad is hard for all of its own reasons (leaving friends—trying to find a job—moving—adjusting), but it also brings a freedom and lack of structure for the first time that I desperately wish I could hold onto for a little bit longer. Dreams don't have to come true right away, but for some, they do, and I should be celebrating for / with them, waiting my turn. Summer is endless this time around, so maybe by the time that things start to change and the gradient is restored, I'll take a step towards my own dream.


My dreams are not your dreams.

My dreams are not your dreams.

My dreams are not your dreams.

My dreams are not your dreams.


This summer for me has been a lot of learning and adjusting in ways I didn't expect to be adjusting. I expected that life in general and the job search were going to be much easier than they actually have been, because it's always been like that for me somehow. It's been hard to represent myself on one piece of paper, and it's disheartening when some people won't even get to see that part of me. Persistence has been the key.


While I try to appear perfect and like I'm holding it all together, things start to get heavy. It feels like I'm carrying giant loads all on my own. I know that this is not actually the case, but some days I forget that's it's okay and relatively easy to ask for help—or the help is already there. Sometimes, all it takes is making your needs known. This past week, I've received so much encouragement and leads to my next steps, and I'm beyond thankful for the people that have been there to help me.


These images were inspired by the thoughts above.















© 2020 by Torrin Nelson